❝she was a beautiful dreamer.
the kind of girl who
kept her head in the clouds,
loved above the S T A R S
and left regret beneath the EARTH
she walked on.❞
“that’s an understatement–” she sighed, “but that’s between the two of us – it’s not going to effect you, i promise. you’ve done nothing but kept it honest with me, red – i’d never hold something like this against you and if did, i’d be a hypocrite and you know how much i hate hypocrisy–” she teased, a hint of a smile at her lips. “eddie is wonderful and i bet you two would be great together, but lils – one question and it’s not me attacking your choices, i just want to understand what you want – did you want to be exclusive with him? with james?”
❝that you do, which is why i’ve always wanted to keep things very clear with you and as soon as he asked i knew i had to tell you because you’re my best friend em, i wouldn’t ever keep something like this from you.❞ lily laughed softly, her gaze falling as she mused over the girls question. was there any use in denying something that was so obvious? ❝he is amazing. and i feel like we might be good together, we already get along so well. listen, i’m not going to say i don’t think about it… i would love it if james and i were together.❞
❝i get jealous when i see him with other girls and most of the time when we’re together i just want to stay there with him. but it’s not something that he wants em. he told me he was seeing someone shortly before we even started off and i know he likes me too, i’m not discrediting that at all and we feel right together but he doesn’t want to take it there. and that’s completely valid too. so i have to stop dreaming about something that isn’t going to happen and try to maybe find someone that does want to be with me too. does that make sense? like i’m not mad at him… i just respect what he thinks and i also think it’s healthy for me to explore my options so i’m not left heartbroken in the end. ❞
“no – no, none of that–” she spluttered out quickly, halting their movements – they had found themselves right before the entrance and yet this had all her attention. “i don’t feel that way about him – i adore him, he’s my friend or well, i’m trying to be his friend and it’s difficult, but it’s not because something’s there, lils” she assured, she was never really eloquent at words, but sometimes being blunt was the way to go.
“i love you for offering that, but i’m okay. i’m happy with fenwick – i feel like myself with him and i don’t want anything but what i have with him– i’m just confused. i just thought you and james–” she trailed off.
❝oh okay, i was just worried because i know things didn’t exactly end on an amazing note but i’m glad you’re okay with this i really am.❞ lily let out a soft sigh of relief, crossing her arms as she turned to face her completely. ❝james made it perfectly clear that we’re not exclusive and that means he’s keeping his options open, so why shouldn’t i? i mean… i like edgar. he’s sweet with me and he’s nice… he cares about me. and it’s easy. it feels nice to have someone like you without the heartache attached to it, does that make sense? james and i, we’re still doing whatever it is we were doing and i’ve told edgar… i think it’s just healthy to keep my options open. ❞
“she hates being babied – we’re going to have to be subtle, the last thing i want is for her to chew my head off – didn’t really understand how much restraint came with walking away until that moment”
her gaze widened as she peered over at her, “eddie? wait – you and eddie? oh” she’d like to think that she was on top of things – rarely one to get blindsided and yet here she was feeling like someone had just given her a real shove.
❝yeah. i don’t really want to approach her because some of the things she said… let’s just say it’s best if i stay clear of her, but i don’t want to abandon her either so i’m going to try and keep an eye out for her.❞ lily chewed on her lower lip, glancing over at the brunette with genuine concern coloring her features. ❝if you’re not okay with it i promise i’ll tell him it’s a bad idea and that we shouldn’t, you have every right to tell me you’re not comfortable with it. ❞
“she basically all but ran from me–” she sighed, “give her space then?” the frown etched at her lips was proof that she wasn’t thrilled, but lily was right – they didn’t really have much of a choice. she didn’t want to drive her so far that they were unsalvageable.
“you’ve got yourself a deal–” a small smile at her lips as she gave her arm a squeeze.
❝exactly. she didn’t want to hear anything i had to say, even when i insisted i thought there was something wrong with her… i guess we should just step back but still keep a close eye on her. i don’t want her to do anything that might harm her…❞ she shrugged, still musing over the situation. it was difficult but the girl hadn’t come up with a solution yet. ❝there was actually something i wanted to talk to you about… so edgar kind of suggested he might want to take me out and i wanted to let you know first.❞
“so – she was terrible to you too?” stopping for a second to face her, “i thought it was just me – i thought i had done something to piss her off, but if she verbally attacked you as well – that’s odd” her brows furrowing as she started their pace once more. “she didn’t mean it–” she muttered, giving her arm a squeeze, “whatever it was red, whatever she said – she didn’t mean it. she couldn’t have. mac would have never mean let alone said the things that she did to me. i don’t know why she’s pushing us away – but i don’t want to just leave her”
“do you want to talk about it?”
❝pretty much. she just… ripped me to shreds without an ounce of regret. it was like she didn’t care and she couldn’t stand seeing me. like she needed to get away from me as quickly as possible. ❞ she shook her head, brushing her hair out of her face as she shrugged. ❝i don’t want to leave her either it’s just… i don’t know how far we can push her before she eventually just cuts us out completely. ❞ lily shook her head quickly, playing with her fingers. ❝NO. not yet at least… i’m slowly sorting things out again just.. give me time okay?❞
“it’s not just that and i know that there’s no proper way to handle this and everyone steers through it the way that they need too – it’s just, she was aggressive” a frown at her lips as she looked at her, “lils – i didn’t recognize her, i haven’t ever seen her like that and i think something’s seriously wrong–”
“yeah? are you getting any sleep?”
❝aggressive is a fond way of putting it. i don’t know what the hell has gotten into her but she didn’t seem like she was in any mood to talk. in fact i think i’m the last person on the planet she’d like to see so i don’t see any way i can possibly help her. i don’t know what’s wrong but em, i honestly wouldn’t know how to fix it either. i already tried reasoning with her and it only landed me a hefty amount of insults and a heavy heart.❞ the redhead was still a little sore over their encounter, mary’s words replaying in her mind constantly. ❝i sleep enough… a few hours more than before at least. ❞
“quidditch, games, staying low on the rita radar – biggest accomplishment on that front is not being in her new article, i think that’s progress, fenwick and i made it official and i think something’s wrong with mac–” listing off everything on her mind from least concerning to something that she was fixated on and mary mac was one of them.
“what about you? what’s going on with you – i want to hear everything”
❝sounds like you’re doing pretty well, i’m glad to hear that. and about mary…. she’s coping as well as we all can i guess. we just have to be there for her.❞ the girl chewed on her lower lip, nodding slowly. she had noticed mary was struggling yet so had she, so she truly had no idea how to offer her friend the help she needed. ❝uh, i guess there’s no everything to tell. i’m just… getting by i guess.❞
“i’m all yours–” a chuckle slipping from her lips as she looped her arm through hers, “he’ll survive fine without me, i’ve missed you red – we do need a night–”
❝now that’s what i wanted to hear. ❞ she flashed a bright smile towards her friend before setting off, pulling the brunette out of the common room and towards the kitchens. ❝so love, how have you been lately. tell me everything i’ve missed. ❞
placing her quill aside, she relaxed against the chair, “i’ve got this–” she assured with a smile, her gaze lighting up at the sight of the marshmallows, “yes– it’s always a yes–” gathering her belongs and stuffing them in the bag, “kitchens?”
❝kitchens it is. then back to mine for a sleepover? i feel like we haven’t had a proper all nighter in quite some time. i’m sure FENWICK can spare a few hours without you, wouldn’t you agree?❞ lily teased, winking playfully before she offered her arm for the girl to take.
“blame sluggy – dear ol’ sluggy did this to me–” gesturing at the six scrolls of parchment. she was done. thank merlin it was over and yet she didn’t want to go to bed.
❝that wonderful endearing bastard. i’ll give him a piece of my mind at the next slug club meeting. i was going to offer my help but it seems like you’ve got it all covered. so how about i interest you in a hot chocolate instead?❞ the girl waved a pack of marshmallows in front of the girls face, a treat she’d snuck back from home and saved for a special occasion.
MUSE A — Bacon ipsum dolor amet pork in excepteur velit laboris mollit quis pariatur veniam dolor ut culpa tempor dolore. Fugiat laboris dolor sirloin ea, tail short loin andouille proident lorem pancetta pig. Dolore swine sirloin do fatback est, salami pancetta esse dolore leberkas ham. Enim pork chop sirloin, aliqua ad nisi spare ribs veniam id.
MUSE B — Sirloin filet mignon voluptate aliquip magna. Tail shank do culpa tenderloin, consequat in ad jowl shoulder swine. Beef ribs kielbasa jowl, in short loin nulla pork loin. Anim porchetta do jowl, drumstick pastrami meatball alcatra fugiat ham hock ut duis dolore in. Non dolore cow nisi strip steak, bresaola pork chop sausage ipsum dolor.