hopelessly hopeful
LILITH MARIE EVANS
Lily Evans
head girl

❝she was a beautiful dreamer. the kind of girl who kept her head in the clouds, loved above the
S T A R S and left regret beneath the EARTH she walked on.❞

jpcttr:

             “ no, no. it makes sense. i mean … you HAVE been looking exceptionally well rested — nice change as of late. i have to ask. is he as dreamy as everyone says? ” he was being snide, hiding his anger behind a smile as he tried to make the situation casual. he had, after all, told her he wanted to be non-exclusive. this was his doing. “ god. you and uh … you and emmeline are just trading everything, aren’t you? ” 

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             he paused, repeating the words he’d just spoken in his head before sighing. “shit that was kinda mean, wasn’t it? i’m sorry … i’m sure you’ll have fun. ”

her teasing smile fading about as quickly as it came, her jaw falling slightly slack as she processed his snide comment. suddenly she was irritated beyond belief and the last person she wanted to speak to was him. ❝rich, potter. don’t worry i’m sure you’ll find someone to go with. let’s see, you’ve already shagged two of the girls that fit your type, shall i tell PREWETT you’ll book her in for the ball or will the closest broom closet do?❞ she shot him a sickly sweet smile, her hands moving to gather her books swiftly. 

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jpcttr:

        “ or maybe i’ll just have to refresh your memory … give you a few lessons here and there. ” his elbows were resting on the table top as he leaned forward — if the scandalous undertones were lost in his words, then surely the lecherous spark in his eyes did the trick. he would’ve leaned forward more, possibly sealing his meaning with a kiss, but her words brought him to a halt. “ … edgar? i … i didn’t know you two were a thing. ” he tried his best to hide his disappointment, failing to a certain degree as he furrowed his brow in confusion. had they dated before? was this a new development? had he been too busy to notice?

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❝i might agree to or lesson or two, ❞ the girl quipped, her pearly white teeth sinking into her lower lip as she too leaned forward the slightest bit, only pulling back when she noticed his expression. had she done something wrong? ❝i wouldn’t call us a THING… remember when we talked about not being exclusive? edgar asked me on a date and i thought about what you said and figured it would be a good idea. when he asked me to the ball i figured it would be a fun evening and i didn’t know you wanted to ask me…❞

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jpcttr:

            “ oh please, ” he said with an eye roll and a smirk. “ i’ve given up on the reading thing ages ago. realized it’s not for me. ” for a brief moment they seemed almost normal; just two teenagers giggling in the corner despite the countless essays and problems breathing down their necks. “ nah i came looking for you …  ni hao piao liang, lily evans. i’d like to formally ask you to the ball. ”

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❝don’t worry about it champ, i’m sure you’ll get the hang of it sooner or later. ❞ she winked, hiding her smile behind the palm of her hand. it almost felt WRONG to be this happy in his presence but she couldn’t help but indulge in the sweet feeling that settled in the pit of her stomach whenever she got a glimpse of his tempting smirk. ❝for me? what can i do for you kind sir? COME AGAIN? my uh… chinese is a little rusty so you’ll have to forgive me and translate.❞ her soft laugh died down as he spoke, her eyes widening at the mention of the ball. he wanted to take HER. he was asking HER. though she was elated (and it was quite obvious in the way her eyes sparkled and her smile grew impossibly wider) her happiness came to a crashing halt as she remembered how she had a previous commitment. ❝the ball? oh JAMES, i’d L O V E to go with you but i’ve… i’ve already agreed to go with EDGAR.

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jpcttr:

          there was a skip in his step, a smile gracing his features — essentially daring the world to claim that he had once been sad. the dark circles were gone given his first real night of sleep and he finally starting looking and feeling the way he had only one year prior. people were right … he only needed a small break. 

           spotting lily at a table in the library, he waltzed up, knocking on the wood before snagging the chair opposite her. “ fancy seeing you here. ”

@xo-lilithmarie

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❝a rare sight i’m sure.❞
when JAMES POTTER was in a good mood, it was positively CONTAGIOUS. his dazzling smile and bright eyes  sent a chill down the redheads spine, her own lips curling up at the edges to match his expression. she adored seeing him like this. ❝what brings you to this side of the castle, come to learn how to r e a d? heard it comes in handy have you?❞ lily teased lightly, leaning towards him almost involuntarily. she was drawn closer to him, there was no denying that much. 

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jpcttr:

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“ the last six years would’ve been different, that’s for sure. ” he thought briefly about what school would’ve been like had she not been there and he continually came up empty, as if he couldn’t possibly imagine a life where she wasn’t around. despite her having said no to him for so long, lily evans still had a large impact on who he was as a person. he hadn’t exactly realized how much until that moment. “ i mean … it’s not exactly a secret, ” he teased, a playful smile etched across his features as he gently rubbed the side of her arm. “ i’m sorry … MY MOVES? i’m gonna need some examples — if only to raise my ego to just … RIDICULOUS standards. can’t smother all of russia with the kind and humble nature i’m currently rockin’. ” 

❝my life would certainly have been quite dull. can you imagine a year without us practically biting eachothers heads off?❞ she teased, glancing back up at him. a life without him was not something she’d ever liked to think about, in fact she couldn’t bring herself to even muster up an imaginative where he wasn’t present. his impact on her life made everything so much brighter, so much better. though she was sure she could think of countless times when he drove her absolutely insane, there was never a time she wished for him to leave her side. ❝HUMBLE? james potter i wasn’t aware you even knew the term. i’ll keep that information to myself and spare the kind people of mother russia, perhaps i’ll let you know at some other time.❞

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jpcttr:

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“ s’good because you know me, i get all my fun facts from you. ” it seemed easier to walk as she moved closer, almost as if they were made to fit perfectly against one another. james didn’t question it — he merely continued along. he always knew that she was made for him; it came as no surprise. “ good morning? PERFECT. i was practicing just this morning. talk about a coincidence. i should warn you though, ” he paused, looking down at her with a mock look of sadness. “ i’m kinda shit at it. ” he scrunched his nose. “ proooobably the worst dancer you’ve ever seen. don’t believe me? ASK THE BOYS. ”

❝whatever would you do without me James Potter, your life would be so terribly dull and frankly quite empty.❞ of course she’d never actually let him experience such a fate, they were bound together for life whether he wanted her around or not. ❝oh you poor lad. i’m going to let you in on a little secret alright?❞ she glanced up at him, her nose scrunched up and her eyes glinting playfully. ❝i’m not that great either, try as i might. perhaps together we can stumble our way through the song and manage a somewhat decent tribute. i do require proof of your lack of skills though, i’ve seen some of your moves, it’s hard to believe you won’t be an excellent dancer.❞ 

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jpcttr:

he wore an embarrassed smile, looking elsewhere as he chuckled to himself. “ what a professional way to put it. i quite enjoy your company as well. ” his disappointment seemed to fade as his smile grew, the boy taking hold of her hand as he began to walk back to the castle. james had a habit of burying his problems beneath other things — whether it be with his attempt at creating a safe haven, his quidditch captain duties, or his habit of forgetting their lack of a real relationship by burying himself in her company. “ oh … y’know, if it’s medically proven — i’d hate to go against science. ” he draped his arm casually over her shoulder and pulled her close as they moved, pressing his lips against her hair in the process. “ think we’ll get our fix; got quite a walk left ahead of us. care to sing? make ‘em laugh? moses supposes his toeses are roses? ”

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she laughed, hiding her face against his chest and shrugging gently. ❝you know i live to provide the most useful scientific facts.❞ the girl settled into his half embrace, wrapping her arm loosely around his waist and stepping closer to him oh so slightly, pressing her tiny frame against his side as they made their way up to the castle. ❝i see your song and raise you a dance, how would you feel about starting with an intricately choreographed version interpretation of ‘good morning’ before we ease into the classic namesake, singing in the rain?❞

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jpcttr:

james hung his head, his left hand now gripping the railing near the edge of the bridge as droplets of water continued to fall. the rain felt cool against his flesh, his face slowly lifting toward the heavens as a hum escaped him. little jamie potter grew up a creature of adventure, not of comfort — he would get antsy if things had become too stable or too routine — so perhaps taking a step back wasn’t so bad. maybe he needed some perspective? “ … if that’s what you think is best. ” he found himself disappointed, like a wonderful example of an asshole — as if he had any right to deny exclusivity and then demand she spend all her time with him. but he wanted to. “ you wanna walk back? ” he asked hesitantly, the rain beginning to pick up as sections of his clothes turned properly drenched. 

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❝i mean, yeah. it might be good for us just so we don’t get CONFUSED. after all, i wouldn’t want you to get sick of having me around just yet. i quite enjoy your company.❞ the girl shrugged, struggling to mitigate the unpleasant feeling of disappointment that lingered in the pit of her stomach. she refused to let herself ruin whatever it was they had so if that meant she’d have to swallow her jealousy then for him SHE W O U L D. ❝hmm, not really but i suppose we should. i wouldn’t want to get a cold or merlin forbid our star quidditch player get sick before a big game. let’s go and warm up by the fire. i think i read somewhere that skin to skin contact is most efficient when fighting off hypothermia.❞

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jpcttr:

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he paused, his brow furrowed in confusion as he took in her calm words and her matching expression. she seemed very nonchalant, almost uncaring. “ no … that’s not what i’m saying AT ALL. ” james looked at her closely, trying his best to gather any hint as to what she was thinking. “ she and i we weren’t serious, but we were still together around the time that THIS started and i didn’t want you to hear about it from someone else. i don’t want this to end … but i also well i also wanted to be upfront. i mean, we’re not EXCLUSIVE. ” 

              she had to look away for a moment to try and pull herself together quickly, not wanting to let her emotions get the best of her as they so often did around him. she wanted to scream that she didn’t WANT to share him, that she wanted them to keep doing what they were doing without having to worry about anyone else touching him like only she was supposed to but a part of her knew that if she did so, there was a big risk of losing him altogether. the girl nodded slowly, tucking a loose piece of her fiery tresses behind her ear as she glanced back at him. ❝thank you for telling me, it sucks hearing those things from the rumor mill. but yeah i completely understand, we’re definitely NOT exclusive. you can see whoever you want to see and i’m free to do the same. i don’t want this to end either. so i guess we should just keep our options open then, maybe take a little step back? gain perspective.❞ 

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jpcttr:

“ i know we never really discussed it … what this is. ” he spoke slowly, eyes wavering from lily to nothing in particular as he fought for the right words. was this even necessary? james wasn’t sure he just knew he wanted to be honest. “ but i wanted you to hear it from me … ” his tone was low, almost a hushed whisper as he finally stopped his attention from traveling. his eyes were now focused on the beautiful girl before him, a sigh falling from his lips as he started. “ i was sort of SEEIN’ SOMEONE before this started and eh … we never properly ended things. ”

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           lily slowly let her hand fall from his grip as she nodded, not really sure where the conversation was headed. ‘he’s not yours, he’s not yours, he’s not yours’ she chanted repeatedly as she crossed her arms, bracing herself for the worse. it was absolutely illogical for her to be upset over what he had to say, even before they started whatever it was they were doing she had no claim on him. hell she still had no right to be jealous if he looked at another girl. and yet, there she was wrestling with her emotions as she cleared her throat, trying to drain any sort of emotion out of her expression. ❝i understand… i think it’s safe to say we kind of rolled into this without really talking about it much. so um, does that mean you want to stop doing whatever, THIS is? because i get that you might want to be with that other person instead.❞

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NETWORK

DROPDOWN TITLE

MUSE A — Bacon ipsum dolor amet pork in excepteur velit laboris mollit quis pariatur veniam dolor ut culpa tempor dolore. Fugiat laboris dolor sirloin ea, tail short loin andouille proident lorem pancetta pig. Dolore swine sirloin do fatback est, salami pancetta esse dolore leberkas ham. Enim pork chop sirloin, aliqua ad nisi spare ribs veniam id.

MUSE B — Sirloin filet mignon voluptate aliquip magna. Tail shank do culpa tenderloin, consequat in ad jowl shoulder swine. Beef ribs kielbasa jowl, in short loin nulla pork loin. Anim porchetta do jowl, drumstick pastrami meatball alcatra fugiat ham hock ut duis dolore in. Non dolore cow nisi strip steak, bresaola pork chop sausage ipsum dolor.

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