hopelessly hopeful
LILITH MARIE EVANS
Lily Evans
head girl

❝she was a beautiful dreamer. the kind of girl who kept her head in the clouds, loved above the
S T A R S and left regret beneath the EARTH she walked on.❞

jpcttr:

               james was taken aback, her words catching him off-guard as he remained silent. his expression appearing unreadable despite the bitterness building deep within his stomach. he had asked her. he just wasn’t fast enough. and maybe he shouldn’t have been, but he found himself angry at her for having said yes to that guy in the first place. “ … i am TRYING. ” he shouted, his emotions getting the better of him, a complete clash against the calmed demeanor he had when first walking in.

               “ okay? i am trying MY HARDEST not to look at you because every time i do, it makes things worse. you think i wanna be here? surrounded by friends and all i can think about is you? … how i can’t have you? how when i said i wanted to be non-exclusive you didn’t even TRY to fight me on it? ” he was already halfway across the classroom before he realized he was even walking, his hidden thoughts spilling from his lips a mile a minute. “ you think it doesn’t bother me watching that guy touch you knowing full well i practically gave him permission to? you think it doesn’t drive me nuts? you think it doesn’t make me sick? the last thing i want to do … is look. at. you. ”

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                                 ❝i’m SCARED i’m going to LOSE you. and i’m trying, i’m really TRYING to be happy. i’m trying to be happy with the idea of having to share you when every inch of me is screaming that you’re M I N E and i don’t want to share you.❞ hot tears threatened to shed as she watched him, her mind racing with his words. he was confusing her with what he said and the actions that had led up to this point. he wanted them to be non exclusive, he said it was best. and now everything was turning into a right mess. 

                            ❝so STOP looking at me. because i love you and i can’t breathe I CAN’T BREATHE when you look at me because it hurts, because you’re not mine and i keep trying to let loose and do whatever the hell it takes to keep you but i can’t breathe.❞ her screams died out towards the end of her sentence, the weight of the last couple of days she’d spent ignoring him finally taking a toll on her. she was exhausted of fighting her need to be close to him, of pushing aside her obvious feelings for him. she didn’t move away or push him away, simply because she COULDN’T. all she could manage to do was look up at him, their faces merely inches away. the most ironic fact to note was how she was previously going on about how she couldn’t breathe and yet with him finally standing close to her, it was like she could finally take a breath of fresh air and that realization nearly broke her. 

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NETWORK

DROPDOWN TITLE

MUSE A — Bacon ipsum dolor amet pork in excepteur velit laboris mollit quis pariatur veniam dolor ut culpa tempor dolore. Fugiat laboris dolor sirloin ea, tail short loin andouille proident lorem pancetta pig. Dolore swine sirloin do fatback est, salami pancetta esse dolore leberkas ham. Enim pork chop sirloin, aliqua ad nisi spare ribs veniam id.

MUSE B — Sirloin filet mignon voluptate aliquip magna. Tail shank do culpa tenderloin, consequat in ad jowl shoulder swine. Beef ribs kielbasa jowl, in short loin nulla pork loin. Anim porchetta do jowl, drumstick pastrami meatball alcatra fugiat ham hock ut duis dolore in. Non dolore cow nisi strip steak, bresaola pork chop sausage ipsum dolor.

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