❝she was a beautiful dreamer.
the kind of girl who
kept her head in the clouds,
loved above the S T A R S
and left regret beneath the EARTH
she walked on.❞
Rab walked lazily into the Great Hall during lunch hours, he was still in his pajamas after skipping class and his hair was sticking out all over. His shirt was loose enough to reveal dark purple marks scattered along his neck. “Why don’t you take a photograph? It’ll last longer.” Rab smirked as he felt eyes on him when he grabbed a sandwich and sat down.
❝i think i’ll be fine but thank you.❞ lily watched him, brows furrowed with confusion as she sat down. ❝are you alright? seems a little late for you to be getting up, i’d imagine its due to a hangover. would you like something to drink that might help?❞
she was angry. granted, her anger was fueled by the alcohol the streamed through her veins and she wasn’t strictly speaking in the right mental state to actually manage her emotions like a normal level headed girl would do. no, she was simmering in rage and she liked it. she welcomed the bitter emotion because for once it was different than sadness. that’s why her dare was so easily carried out.
it was quite easy to slip away from the party, no one would really be missing her in the midst of the sex and overall debauchery. lily swiftly found her way down to the slytherin dungeons, the red head carrying a single bottle of spray paint she’d snagged from her friend ADIE. she surveyed the walls, her blank canvas, imagining how she would go about her task. finally, she got to work, the soft hiss coming from the bottle only egging her on.
only a few short minutes later, lily stepped back to admire her work, the words “POMPOUS HYPOCRITICAL SNAKES” glowing in contrast to the morbid walls surrounding them. it wasn’t much of an insult, lily was aware that given the chance they would retaliate with nastier words. she didn’t want to stoop that low however and it was enough to grant her a sense of relief.
that relief however was short lived. filch cleared his throat, alerting the head girl of his presence and thus completing her dare. ‘get caught vandalizing school property, particularly something within slytherin territory.’
he chuckled slightly, eyes softening as he looked at the girl in distress.
“girl as smokin’ as you? be an honor.” he was never one to pry, possibly didn’t care about anyone enough to. so he did what most do in awkward situations, he made a joke.
“do me a solid though, yeah? try an’ keep those eyes dry for just a lil’ longer. tears ain’t gonna taste too hot.” a subtle grin pulled at his lips as a curled finger tapped against her nose teasingly, calloused hands grazing against her face as he pulled her in toward him.
❝you flatter me sweets, don’t make me blush.❞
she laughed softly, slowly turning to face him, thankful for the way he tried to make her smile without necessarily getting into the subject. she appreciated the break from her thoughts.
❝yeah i think i can manage that much.❞
a faint smirk touched her soft lips as she watched him move closer, her teeth sinking into her lower lip as the anticipation of a kiss sent chills down her spine. she let out a soft moan of relief once his lips finally touched hers, providing a much needed distraction.
“ L O O K … you’re CLEARLY having a shitty night , so i’m gonna leave before you say something you’re gonna regret — because i’m serious , you’re going to need a friend when you decide to crawl out of whatever H O L E you’re digging yourself . ”
he gave her one final glance , a shake of his head following as he turned around to leave . he didn’t know WHAT THE FUCK happened or WHY it happened , he just knew that he wasn’t interested in beating around the bush anymore . if she didn’t want to talk about it , then he wasn’t going to push it .
she crumbled onto the ground, her hands traveling up to her ginger locks as she gripped at the loose buns that adorned the top of her head. she couldn’t take it anymore, the glances she’d caught in passing, the burning mourning she’d concealed from the world, the heart aching feelings she’d struggled to conceal each time he smiled her way, the guilt that weighed on her shoulders ever since she realized she had singlehandedly ruined any chance she had with him. she couldn’t deal with any of it ANYMORE.
what made it burn most was that he didn’t c a r e. not anymore, not like he did before. he was her FRIEND. nothing more. and she couldn’t make him, she didn’t deserve the attention. so instead of running towards him and telling him everything, how she felt, how she wanted nothing more than to run into his embrace, how she was barely holding her life together, how she was terrified every waking moment of every waking day, how she missed her father, how she didn’t know how she was going to get through the rest of the year…
she just gave up and let him walk away, accepting that things were NEVER going to be the same.
“ how ‘bout i come back in TWENTY FIVE? ” he said , his words laced with snark and hostility as he dropped the only half burned cigarette on the forest floor . james had spent years on the shitty end of her anger and he refused to be subject to that AGAIN , especially since he hadn’t done anything to deserve it .
stomping out the still burning stick , he began to walk away , only stopping briefly when he let his annoyance get the better of him . “ y’know , i’m gettin’ real TIRED of the re-runs . maybe it’s time i just CHANGE THE CHANNEL . ”
❝yeah well, maybe you should.❞
she got up abruptly, her hands clenched into fists as she let her anger get the best of her. she wasn’t mad at him, she was mad at herself but he was THERE and it was so much easier to unload the guilt and sadness on him rather than wallow in self pity and desire.
❝it shouldn’t be hard, you already made it clear you don’t give a flying rats ass what i do. besides it’s been a LONG time since things changed.❞
she watched him, eyes blazing as the jealousy she’d tried to keep buried (quite poorly) simmered up to the surface.
he furrowed his brow , watching her carefully as if trying to understand why she was acting the way she was . her words were DRENCHED with ANIMOSITY and her gaze practically shot daggers in his direction . he didn’t understand it and he sure as shit didn’t appreciate it , though he remained calm . perhaps she had her reasons .
“ did i say it bothered me ? nah . lily evans can do WHATEVER & WHOEVER she pleases . ” he tapped the ash away , his gaze never wavering . “ what’s going on with you , HUH ? what i do to PISS YOU OFF ? ”
❝hm. guess you’re right, you don’t give a SHIT.❞
her eyes burned as soon as she said it, forcing her to look away.
❝you did absolutely nothing James Potter. i’m allowed to have one shit night, sorry i can’t slap on my habitual fake smile for you right now, come back in twenty and i’m sure the lily evans show will resume its regularly scheduled showing.❞
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